December 31, 2019 at 05:00PM by CWC
We all face personal challenges that make us feel deeply uncomfortable, and if these issues, habits, and traits go unidentified and unaddressed, they stand to stunt our emotional growth. Each Myers-Briggs type has its own unique pain points and areas for improvement. (Yep, even ENTPs, ESTPs, and ESFPs, who tend to act like they have none at all.) So, it’s certainly worth introspecting about your personality background as a strategy for pinpointing the most effective way to get out of your comfort zone.
And, what better time than now to create new goals and eliminate the road blocks holding you back? So check out how to get out of your comfort zone based on your personality type. (Don’t know what your MBTI is? Read this first!)
Below, find the best way to get out of your comfort zone, according to your Myers-Briggs personality type.
ISFJ: Ask for what you want
You’re sensitive to being ignored or not heard, which often means you avoid speaking up for what you really want—whether it’s a raise at work, a change to your home life, or a commitment. Get out of your comfort zone and use your voice. You have a lot to say and a right to ask.
ESFJ: Put yourself first
You are comfortable putting the needs of others in front of your own. So, figure out what you need before investing more externally: Are you focusing so much on your friends because you need validation? Are you focusing so much on your partner, trying to earn their love, because you don’t feel you’re worthy? All efforts to channel energy into others might be self-avoidance. Let this year be one of reflection and self-care.
ISTJ: Move away from the clear path
You are capable of conquering anything with your hard work, but you wonder if you can step outside commonly accepted formulas of success. So take the risk. If you embrace possibility, by walking outside the black and white into the gray, you will find a way. You work well under pressure, so create pressure.
ESTJ: Set goals for your personal life
You’re a master at setting life and career goals and executing them, but you can skew passive in your personal life, preferring to date casually or commit lightly. Goal-setting can take your relationships deeper, so can starting a new hobby with another person. If you’re in a promising new relationship, resolve to meet your partner’s parents before spring, make Valentine’s Day plans, and plan a vacation. Keep checking milestones, and you’ll realize you’re relationship-building, just like you build everything else in your life.
ESFP: Commit and follow through
You don’t like to be tied down. The idea that you can’t do something freaks you out—whether that means flirt with others, travel at a moment’s notice, or anything else—even if you don’t want to do it anyway. Your relationships will deepen the more you hold yourself accountable to them, and you may find that new adventures exist within the boundaries of promised commitments.
ISFP: Confront your hurt feelings
You tend to run problems and leave chaos in your wake. If you have hurt feelings, you may blow up a friendship; and if you have a relationship spat, you may text your ex. Instead of escalating tensions, learn to be vulnerable and say what you feel.
ESTP: Look inward
You have a hard time confronting your personal feelings and are thus a master of avoidance. Instead, you often adopt the feelings of others, but this doesn’t have to be the case. Let your actions and desires be your guide. You often know what you want to do, which is the gateway to what you feel. Sit with your feelings and learn to articulate them before impulse takes over.
ISTP: Build intimacy
You are great at maintaining casual friendships, but not great at building deep relationships with friends, family, or romantic prospects. The key to relationships is intimacy, which means sharing details about your life and feelings. You always think no one cares, but they do. Work on sharing more about yourself, and you’ll see your relationships blossom in the new year.
ENFP: Set actual goals
You are very capable, with your unique mix of an interpersonal and analytical mind. However, you often don’t set goals because you are afraid of what will happen if you don’t achieve them. You will accomplish so much if you simply create a plan, and stick to it. Don’t fear the big emotions after a big challenge. You are uniquely prepared to tackle any challenge—and also recover when you miss the mark.
INFP: Take a risk on your feelings
You know yourself so well, but you’re afraid to act on your strong feelings or shame yourself for them. But it’s okay to forgo the pragmatic career or the practical relationship choice for something that you’re more passionate about. For you, this actually the best choice for long-term happiness. Don’t be afraid to follow your heart, even if others tell you doing so is silly. You are great at making the impossible more realistic.
ENFJ: Articulate negative feelings
You don’t know what to do with negative feelings. You even blame yourself for having them sometimes. You’re afraid to hurt others as a result of speaking your mind, but you’re also articulate and can trust your conflict management skills. That is, unless you’re pushed to your personal limit, which is when you tend to blow up at a friend who’s hurt your feelings or abused your trust. Learn to call out issues early on to keep yourself from saying things you’ll regret in the heat of the moment.
INFJ: Resist the urge to “cancel”
You would often rather cut someone out of your life than sit down with them to work out a problem. You don’t like conflict, and you will distance yourself instead of stay in the relationship and blow up when you’ve been pushed too far. To get out of your comfort zone, try writing an email or text if the thought of initiating a conversation about hurt feelings seems challenging. And moving forward, work to be direct and clear as a means to preserve your friendships.
INTJ: Try it before you knock it
You can be a little bit of a know-it-all, even when you don’t mean to be. You have such a keen, intuitive sense of what you will like and dislike based on great understanding of yourself. Still, sometimes, you’re wrong. To get out of your comfort zone, try to experience more before you say, “I will not like that.”
INTP: Take action on your ideas
Your safe space is your own mind. You are free to explore without the fear of failure. Challenge yourself to take just one of your big ideas and put action behind it. You don’t have to create everything all at once.
ENTP: Find reasons to stay
When you are tired of someone or something, your first instinct is run instead of make changes to create a better experience. So rather than run, add novelty by seeking mentors and connecting with others instead of pouring yourself entirely into completely other initiatives. Build fulfilling experiences by seeking out more ways to be satisfied. It’s the only way to get anywhere deep in life.
ENTJ: Take a risk on imperfect
You’re uncomfortable committing your time and energy to what is imperfect because of your impossibly high standards. This can cause you to miss out on great opportunities, to fall in love or to find a new career path. Often, the things that feel perfect for you ultimately end up being lackluster. To get out of your comfort zone, invest in whatever intrigues you and engages you—perfect or not. (In fact, imperfect is better. It’s real.)