February 13, 2020 at 01:00PM by CWC
While growing up, my mother, like many mothers, gave me quite a bit of unsolicited love advice. That’s how I first learned about astrological polarity, which says we are magnetically drawn to people of polar opposite zodiac signs. This yin-to-yang connection is essentially the universe’s version of opposites attracting, but can the secret to having a healthy long-term relationship really be so simple?
Well, it’s complicated, because compatibility isn’t just a matter of matching sun signs. “Astrologers often say that the remedy for any sign’s neurosis is the enlightened qualities of the opposite sign,” astrologer Juliana McCarthy previously told Well+Good, caveating that opposite sun signs only work well together if other parts of your zodiac chart flow. So many personalized nuances of a natal chart factor into whether you’re a good romantic match for someone, astrologically speaking. That said, knowing your astrological magnet may explain certain surface-level dynamics—like, say, who’s worth a right swipe on Bumble and why you keep attracting people born in September.
To that point, astrologer Rachel Lang breaks is here to break down these fruitful and, at times, complicated dynamics between opposite zodiac signs, and suggests how each pairing can get along harmoniously.
1. Aries (March 21 to April 19) and Libra (September 23 to October 22)
As the most incendiary of the fire signs, Aries acts on impulse, is headstrong, and is known to jump into action with intensity. Meanwhile, Libra benefits from taking time to ponder, considering both sides of the story, and seeking balance. When these opposite zodiac signs meet, the spark is instantaneous.
“Aries presents as being very confident, and Libra finds that attractive,” Lang says. “This is the axis line of independence versus interdependence—the line between the self and other. While Libra is the sign of relationships, they lean toward being a little codependent. But their sign is all about balance, so they often do their own thing as well.”
For Aries and Libra to be successful as a match: they need to figure out how to love each other and give space, respect, and affection. “With an Aries, Libra needs to assert themselves and learn from their partner how to prioritize their needs and desires,” Lang says. “With a Libra, Aries needs to show adoration.”
2. Taurus (April 20 to May 20) and Scorpio (October 23 to November 21)
Passion underscores the Taurus and Scorpio dynamic. Since sensuality is paramount to both, they can’t keep their hands off each other, and their fixed-sign energy forms an almost mystical (and, again, very sexual) bond.
“For Taurus, it’s in pure physical pleasure: good food, soft linens, and sex,” Lang says. “For Scorpio, physical pleasure is a transcendent experience, especially sex. They feel intensely, even if they don’t always show their partner what they’re feeling.”
For Taurus and Scorpio to be successful as a match: The potential problem at play is that Scorpio refuses to reveal what’s happening behind the curtain, and neither brutally stubborn sign is keen to compromise. To make the dynamic work, though, Taurus needs to learn how to read between the lines, and Scorpio can appeal to the Taurus appreciation for beautiful things and emotional security. “This can be a true power couple, too, as Taurus and Scorpio both need to have a sense of material success,” Lang says.
3. Gemini (May 21 to June 20) and Sagittarius (November 22 to December 21)
These opposite zodiac signs share a love of exploration: Curious Gemini explores intellectually, socially, and sexually, while Sagittarius energy is a more relaxed and agreeable type of adventuresome the runs on wanderlust. As such, this pair’s biggest challenge is commitment issues. “Even happily married Gemini-Sagittarius couples need individual space,” says Lang. “Both signs crave freedom and can become bored if they feel stagnant. It’s important for them to find ways to maintain mutual interests.” While conversation between these opposite zodiac signs is sharp and free-flowing, Sagittarius tends to think bigger-picture, while Gemini works in meticulous ways.
For Gemini and Sagittarius to be successful as a match: This dynamic can be both a blessing and a curse, depending on other variables at play. “Sagittarius may feel bogged down by the details, and Gemini may feel like the administrative assistant in the relationship if Sagittarius doesn’t care about those details—such as schedules, social calendars, and who’s cleaning the bathrooms this week,” Lang says. So, as long as Gemini and Sagittarius can recognize how important to them freedom is, they may be able to make it work well. (An open relationship and backpacking tours around the world may help to facilitate that.)
4. Cancer (June 21 to July 22) and Capricorn (December 22 to January 19)
The Cancer and Capricorn matchup screams “power couple,” because they’re seemingly two halves of having it all—blending needs for domesticity and professional accomplishment.
“Cancer wants to build a nest for their family and wants security—financially and emotionally,” Lang says. “Capricorn needs to feel as if they’re reaching a goal. They have ambition, and they also appreciate providing a secure environment for themselves and their family. They are upwardly mobile, and they tend to reach their goals through diligent work.”
For Cancer and Capricorn to be successful as a match: The dilemma with a Capricorn and Cancer union is when the division of labor doesn’t feel equitable. Cancer might feel as if they’re doing all the work at home, for example, and that can breed resentment. “Capricorn in this relationship needs to watch that they don’t put all their focus on work and their own independent activities and take Cancer for granted,” Lang says. “Cancer will need to assert themselves in this duo because Capricorn may not notice if Cancer’s in a bad mood or upset.” For this dynamic to thrive for the long-term, Capricorns would be wise to be mindful of Cancer’s sensitivities and to reassure that they are emotionally available to them.
5. Leo (July 23 to August 22) and Aquarius (January 20 to February 18)
Leo and Aquarius are fixed signs, which means they have plenty of staying power—a bond that, for better or for worse, is hard to break. “For Leo, passion is extremely important. For Aquarius, intellectual stimulation is important,” says Lang. “Both signs tend to value their friendships and community, which is certainly where they can shine as a couple.” However, Leo needs to be worshipped and adored, whereas Aquarius just needs to be accepted for their creative genius.
For Leo and Aquarius to be successful as a match: Since both have a strong, independent sense of self and want the freedom to do their own thing, they need to set aside their ego and focus on keeping things fresh, fun, and light. “For Leo, remember that Aquarius needs to feel as if you have a strong basis of friendship,” Lang says. “For Aquarius, remember that Leo needs to feel really seen. The pair works well when they play together.”
6. Virgo (August 23 to September 22) and Pisces (February 19 to March 20)
Virgo and Pisces have wildly different worldviews, but the all-knowingness of Pisces is an asset to Virgos, who don’t simply want to learn, but want to learn well. Their minds meld with a spark of passion, and they level each other off. “I’ve seen a number of happy Virgo-Pisces couples, because Virgo can be a real grounding presence for Pisces, and Pisces can help Virgo break the habit of overanalyzing,” Lang says. “Pisces inspires Virgo’s creativity, and vice versa. One of Pisces’ challenges is materializing dreams and goals. Virgo has the solution for this because they can offer practical suggestions and outline a detailed plan.”
Of course, the rigidness of Virgo can leave them hung up on all the details and frustrated when Pisces changes their mind about plans. Virgos will go out of their way for date night, plotting out dinner reservations, followed by a 7:20 p.m. movie, followed by drinks at the wine bar by their house, followed by scheduled sex. Pisces, on the other hand, may send a text an hour before this slate of events commences saying, “I can’t!!! It’s a lunar eclipse!”
For Virgo and Pisces to be successful as a match: Virgo, be patient with your Pisces partner. And Pisces, be respectful of your Virgo partner’s Google Calendar. If you can crack that dynamic, you’re set for success.